7 Things I would tell a Younger me

 

What would you say to your younger self?

This is a question I pondered when I saw a photograph recently of a young man taken 30 years ago.

A picture of a young man with the innocence and bright eyes of hope and expectation.

About to graduate business school and enter a world with different rules and an environment harsher than the one he had grown up and protected from.

A photo I had never seen before, and couldn’t remember being taken, and one that rocked me some because the subject’s perceived naivety.

I wanted to ask him at that moment of time, what he hoped for, believed in, and what the future held?

In return I would give him the heads up. Maybe give him the edge to get ahead faster, further but not rob him of the challenge and exuberance of personal independence.

I saw as my 7 pearls of wisdom.A list that would not overwhelm him but serve him all his life. Give him a short cut.

"Keith, can I have a moment? Why yes” he says. "Who are you? You look familiar?” He adds.

"Lets say I know you and thought some words of advice might help. it could save you a lot of time, and emotion." I add.

"Yes, okay sounds okay."

“Please . If I could leave them with you, but then I must rush and won’t be able to discuss them.

"But we’ll catch up in the future.”

“Okay.” He looks bewildered and puzzled but respectful as I knew he would be.

I begin.

1/ What goes around, Comes around

Don’t worry where you start, it only matters where you finish. Over time those who finish first, will finish last and vice versa.

Life is unpredictable. Play the hand you are dealt. Never compare yourself with another be it money, skill, family, looks or material

goods. Because when we compare, we draw comparison with someone’s best with our worst. A comparison that will never win for you.

If you hang in there, and want it badly enough, you will achieve it, have it, or become it over time.

2/ Don’t become Good, become Great

The world is full of good people. Good has become the new normal of mediocre. If you think people are scared of failure wait to you find how people

are more afraid of something else. Success. Of being great. Why you might ask? You will be warned by others, people who are your closest

in a bid to save your from hurt, disappointment. Don’t aim so high. Have realistic expectations they will say. They know if you become great at something it threatens their own standing. Their own self esteem and acceptance of mediocre. The most competition takes place at the ‘good' level. Its rarified air where the “great’ populate. Aim for the stars. Live your dreams Remember the competition is at its most at the level of good.

3/ When the Student is ready, the Teacher will come.

You are about to graduate from RMIT. Good. Now the learning starts. You think now you have finished that you should be entitled to top dollar from the getgo.

Son the learning is only now about to start. Your ‘piece of paper’ just gets you into the game. It is no guarantee you will get a job, and if you do, you will feel you are underpaid for that job, fore in your mind it doesn’t match the level of effort and training you have had. You are about to learn a major life lesson, unless you are joining the public service, which you aren’t, you are paid in arrears for results not time. Your best employers' will select you on your attitude and not on your skill.

You are about to become part of one of the most dynamic periods of human existence and change will be exponential.You will be both challenged but rewarded if you keep ahead of the change continuum. The only thing you must do is become a life long learner. Many will not. There is the opportunity.

4/ In Credit we Distrust.

With prosperity, which you will be front centre of, will come all sort of ‘toys’ and 'must haves'. What’s more you will want it all, and now. You will not earn enough fast enough to pay for them all. Enter credit. Eager. Seducing banks and financial institutions.

You will appease your conscious knowing that there is arguably good debt and bad debt. I will not be able in your early years to stop you falling under the spell of such economic devices. But I do say to you seek out and learn to understand the concept of Compound Interest. Better known as the 8th wonder of the world.

5/ To have good friend, be a good friend

You have established good relationships with many friends, through family school and soon work. Many of these people will wash through your life, just as you will with them. That is not a disadvantage or a negative but whilst you have common goals your relationship will be tight and meaningful.

But as time, jobs and roles change so will the range and composition of these colleagues and associates. But a handful will mean more to you than others. But good friendships don’t just happen. They must be worked on continually and pro-actively.

Don’t wait for others to contact you, and remain aloof and remote. You must be willing to be a good friend first, to have good friends who will be there for you.

6/ Be a Goal setter, but also appreciate Happenstance and Serendipity.

You will be bitten early the need for lists and goal setting. In fact you will become a goal setting fanatic, that will rise to another level the day you find out about SMART.

But don’t become a good luck denier. Appreciate yes you do make some of your own luck, but there is a major part of life made of serendipitous occurrences and randomness.

Being in the right place at the right time. Meeting your future wife, a night you worked in a bar she walked in with friend, the day you called in in the off chance of seeing a mate and his boss offering you a job that would change your future. Your parents moving to he other side of town when you were 17 years, an action that was deliver your 15 minutes of fame.

So be on the look out for those opportunities that others may just call luck.

7/ You have but one thing. Time and not enough of it.

Understand as change accelerates in the very near future, it has an invert relation with Time. Relatively it becomes shorter.

You have arrived on Earth, and like everyone else, you have arrived with one thing (other than the fear of loud noises) and that is Time.

You have the same number of minutes in the hour, hours in the day, and days in the year. Your life will be run by the clock. Whilst people speak of getting more time, they can’t

You should look to leverage your own. Leveraging your money for greater return, in the least amount of time. Saving your own time by employing others, to leverage your skills and through the time and specialist training of others.

Minimising the wasting of your time through mechanical devices (whether that be through inventions of the future Microwaves, Computers, Blowers, and faster cars and jet planes.- on second thought forget I said blowers!)

When you apply your own time treat all things equal, but some things more equal than others. Base your allocation of your time according to priorities which flow from your goals. The challenge is to stop distractions ( your’s and other people’s) and appreciate Vilfredo Pareto’s 80/20 rule.

But remember its latter than you think. But not to late to learn.

Finally. Life is Short. Enjoy it. Don’t take it or yourself to seriously.

Laugh.Laugh often. Laugh louder and longer. And most importantly enjoy the ride! I know it is going to be a great one.

"Keith don’t worry if these things don’t make sense now. They will eventually.’ I finish.

"Oh no!” He says. " Some sound helpful. But I guess I am a different type than you.”He adds. "You seem a little heavy and too serious.And if you don’t mind me saying. A little spooky! I could never be you."

"Bye the way who is it we know in common?" He asks inquisitively.

"Sorry Keith, got to run. We will meet I am sure sometime in the future.” I finish.

"Wait, wait before you go!! “ He yells after me.

"Hey you left something.

"This rectangle thingy. With the bitten apple…"

"Hey you…."

A YOUNG WOMAN"S COURAGE is an example to us all

She is a young girl with a stick. I am terrified.

She is blind to the danger. I just watch in awe to see how courageous she is.

Let me explain. I live near a very busy intersection, which is the southern arterial into Melbourne CBD. An 8 lane high road (4 lanes each direction), which I daily walk cross, but never without great awareness and caution.

Apart from the thunderous roar of 180,00 cars, trucks and bikes daily the intersection has traffic lights to give direction to right and left turning traffic and, to when is safe, for pedestrians to cross. Even when I take guide from the 'green man' when to cross I do with the utmost of caution as vehicles run amber and red lights showing almost fatal disregard to others in a race across town to their destination.

To underpin my caution I unconsciously put my senses of hearing and sight on notice for danger as I cross for the unpredictability of drivers and riders.

Often I see this young blind girl with a white cane girl tentatively but confidently feel her way by a guiding her cane, hearing, and feeling her way.

How does she and many like her have the courage to do that? Have you ever seen someone like that and asked yourself? What if they get it wrong? Taking just one false step could be fatal.

With all her courage and risk involved in just getting to work or school( the Blind institute possibly her destination 3 kilometres away) she could show us a thing about how we could get from our own life. You see whilst she in conjunction with a 'seeing' guide would have repeatedly covered the route in preparation for her first solo trip and note key points to navigate future occasions, many we would be unawares of like the 'lego" pavement signalling to her she is approaching the intersection, and also using her sense of smell for trees and flowers to indicate her location.

But this young girl, and the many others like her can teach us a thing about life and how to be more adventuresome and successful.

But as good as her senses and helped by the many digital tools she obviously cannot know all the details and steps how to get from A to B. She takes risks just by venturing out of home in the belief they have the preparation and skills to get from one side of the city to the other.

But often in our setting of our goals we hesitate to take action and step forward until we see al the steps to the destination. We suffer bouts of procrastination and falter to take action because we cannot see all the steps in high detail.

So our goals are on the wimpish side. We are risk adverse.

In these circumstances, if we stretch at best, our goals will be just outside our comfort zone. If this had always the case we wouldn't have a man on the moon and someone like Richard Branson would be a record store owner. Christopher Columbus would have taken 15 century tourists on day jaunts off the Spanish coats and Australian PM , Tony Abbott still a concrete plant manager(which in this case may have been a good thing.)

In our goals we must accept to make great progress in our life, we may not see all the detail or steps along the way. But trust our ability, our learned skills and hone our senses to pick up on the clues and the talisman along our route to our destination.

Life is risky. Our goals have options of risk and failure. Just as Columbus did to take the risk of his life and leave the safety of the shoreline. But the risk makes the achievement so much sweeter. Kennedy would never have made the statement in 1960 to go where no man has gone before if he thought it would not have motivated and galvanised a nation. (He was to pay the ultimate price in his goal to unify his presidency when he travelled south to Dallas that fateful day in November 1963.)

A critical characteristic of entrepreneurs is they have a scotoma which is a partial blind spot in their vision. I know in ventures I have started there were blind spots that latter when I realised, I shuddered and say to myself "what was I thinking?"

One major venture I started in a recession with limited promise of clients. I do wonder if i new then what I know now, I would have taken the punt and ventured past my own shore.

Inspirational speaker Denis Waitley nailed it when he said: "A dream is your creative vision for your life in the future. You must break out of your current comfort zone and become comfortable with the unfamiliar and the unknown.

Our comfort zone can be our greatest challenge to our ability to achieve our destiny and promised greatness. Setting goals within our comfort zone can at the best promise that we can ever achieve above 'good'. We are likely to die with songs unsung, books unwritten, sporting records unchallenged and egos unfractured.

But if we do?

Can be summed up by Tan Le; "I have stepped outside my comfort zone enough to know that yes, the world doe fall apart but not in the way we fear."

What Reality TV Can Teach us about Surviving our World

                                                 

"I AM A CELEBRITY GET ME OUT OF HERE ! is about to start on Oz TV. I know because the overflow of hype is even getting to me. 

Its about B lister wannabes  dropped into the African jungle to mingle in an environment of things that creep, crawl, sting and bite.

Even Betfair is running a book. Who will re-enter the known world with bragging rights to King or Queen of the jungle? Also giving odds who will be the first to pull the pin? I would  bet on me the first to go AWOL. Why because I am a card caring member of the cowards' club that freaks when a leech attaches itself whilst I was swimming in waterholes in Jabiru, NT.

But maybe even here in this latest television reality show there are secrets to learn for our success.

You see I am a great believer that in the most negative circumstances comes a point of positive learning that we can benefit from. So be it, even if it is  contrived reality TV.

Without knowing all the rules and conditions of the show, the last man or woman standing, will be the result of a series of challenges based on human nature which go back to our origin and survival. We could learn from this to make our own life more successful.

The eclectic celebrity group pitched against the wilds of the jungle will require the collaboration of others to get them through the  hostile environment. Individuals who didn't know each other weeks ago will be forced to team, communicate and empower each other. Certainly in the early stages to survive the conditions ( and the rules). As light and entertaining as this contrived adventure 'soapie' will be, it is a metaphor why we are the dominant species on our planet.

Hebrew University of Jerusalem,  Professor, Dr Yuval Noah Harari (author of 'A Brief History Of Humankind')  on respected Radio National 'Big Ideas' recently  spoke in his keynote address why Homo Sapiens (i.e. us) are the lone surviving species ( there were 6 originally and we are the remaining one), what led to the demise of our 'competition' and what was the one characteristic that got us top of the heap in the animal kingdom. 

He believes it was the unique ability to collaborate,  to cooperate flexibly in both small and large numbers, form into clans, tribes and later nations.

No other animal species can do that (although many form herds and groups ) but not in major numbers . This has led us , till now at least, to prosper and take on enemies and competitor species. (BTW - it looks like our prehistoric antecedents had blood on our hands and guilt with the fate of the other 5 species including Neanderthals.)

FAST FORWARD TO TODAY. Each of us form teams with people we know intimately and able with those we have just met ( the escape of a pair caught in the Sydney siege were not to each other hours before) to achieve mutual goals.  Parents form a bond to educate and raise their children,  sporting clubs to win premierships,  and organizations to meet charitable causes , and armies to defend and see off invaders.

We are social creatures, that would not survive today if it wasn't the interdependence with others. Adam Smith's specialization of labor saw to this.

While we depend on Coles or Woolies to feed us, I shudder to think how our life would change and  what would happen if we reverted to the store open hours of the 60s and 70s. IMAGINE  not being able to buy liquor after 6pm and closed on Sundays.

This may be all apparent with essentials on Maslow's Hierarchy, but I am not sure we appreciate  how we could take it to the next level and maximise this effect.

Lets face it. Life is tough. Not many of us get to the top of the ladder. Its as if we haven't been given the code to get past struggle street. This can be demonstrated by the few 'haves' and the many 'have nots". Also supported by stats which has 80% of the community on some form of welfare.  What I propose is that each of us to survive and prosper in this dynamic and complex world should appoint  and form our own specialist team (high performance coaches if you would) but in all areas of our and our families life and development. To look after and ensure our health, wealth and prosperity. You might think what I propose in fact takes place. I agree but more on an adhoc basis and not too the level and high standard we should aim for. A collaboration of a highly skilled group there for us.

Even Colliers International, commercial real estate giant has stopped 'hot desks' in preference to chairs and desks that can  be configured into collaborative groups at will.

This  team of high standard specialists that known to us and appointed by us  are fully briefed committed to  our aspirations. For example Team Millar would comprise:

• GP Medical doctor                                               
• Solicitor
• Parenting  Expert    
• Career councilor
• Mentor
• Psychologist
• Happiness expert
• Dietician
• Health and Wellbeing coach
• Financial & Investment advisor

Today we find ourselves too busy to attend a doctor regularly, we go to a local lawyer at the corner, we rarely seek out parenting advice preferring to learn on the job, badly fitted to jobs we are poorly trained for and usually hate, suffering mental illness ranging from mild bouts in depression to bi polar.

The most richest and successful, from Bill Gates to Google's Eric Schmidt, say that everyone should have a mentor and coach. As for health, happiness and diet very few give a second thought yet many say they are unhappy betting big time on winning the lottery to solving this.

History tells us, we are served on a needs basis in each of these areas often by people who have dubious communication skills and usually at best mediocre . The excuse is time , money or that we see each as a commodity that can be purchased at a moments notice. Absolutely correct. If we are willing to gamble with such life affecting areas and accept whatever the outcome from people who are chosen because they are geographically handy.

Alternatively each appointed to our DREAM team ( such for the example, Team Millar) would be scrutinised closely and  highly detailed on the family and each's aspirations. Client service, professional knowledge and ability to communicate in non professionalese would be expected premium standard. They would be pro active in meeting our needs and as concerned and committed about us achieving our goals as we are.

Their service would  include at least annual reviews, webinars for people to catch up from the comfort of their homes, and educational seminars. (Seminars and virtual meetings will become common as the high speed NBN  is rolled out).  Importantly these would not be an excuse to 'flog' a product of the moment which many today financial advisers are guilty, but to add to their clients' knowledge about their personal success and well being.

The Dream team of your own key band of people who would simply know where WE stand,  where WE are heading and provide a pro active means of how WE might  get there.

Will the appointment to our first 11, become common. Sadly no. People preferring,  by default of the rushed society we live today, taking the transactional approach to life.

Is it a new idea? No! But it is done to a limited extent by some of  the most successful in our community. Should it be done by more. YES. and whats more a happiness and well being , let alone financially, a 'business case could be made which shows how much better we would be off.

Maybe its worth a try, just  to over come the challenges of Today's world. Not the least being mediocre professional service.

4 Things to do to CRANK UP the year!

Start of the Year

Resolutions we don’t stick to, and within a short time, its business as usual.
The Cause: Because we are unreasonable with what we want and the habits we are able to change.
The Answer: Make the changes EASY, REALISTIC, EMOTIVE and can be quickly RECALLED and REMEMBERED.

Here are my suggestions you might try. Importantly they will have an immediate impact on your year

They are:

• Don’t set monthly goals, set QUARTERLY  goals instead- factors out the seasonality

• Throw EVERYTHING at the year early to get momentum.

• Pick only ONE most major thing for the quarter that must be done.- Focus on the biggest obstacle, greatest challenge, or relationship needed to be developed or fixed

• Build your business on referrals and become referable.To do that Arrive on time, Do what you said  you would do, AND Say PLEASE and THANK YOU.

Hard. I wouldn’t have thought so!

Go on. Go on try it. I dare you!